More than anything I think I’m confused. More immediately, incredibly stressed after a talk with my dad which reminded me of the myriad responsibilities I have and how difficult and constant an undertaking it is to be a good person. The terrible frustration is that I can’t even complain with intellectual honesty, because it’s not the lack of choice that bothers me. I know I have choices – I would like to think that I’m not stupid enough to miss that. As always, I guess it’s the conflict between what you want and what you need to do :(
Even beyond that – friends, work, universities – I’m not sure where I’m going and my own reactions and inclinations have become inscrutable and unfathomable even to myself :(
I can’t lose these three weeks D:
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