I don’t know what I have been wallowing in for the past week, but it’s definitely not conducive to productivity or happiness or doing well on my final IB exams (and hence, entering university). I keep trying to remind myself that I quite literally don’t have a back-up, and it’s either go to the UK or … work in Subway for a year. Or something. As far as motivational speeches go, it’s not as effective as I’d hope.
The highlight of the day was making pesto by hand. It was for a friend’s surprise dinner for his girlfriend, who is vegetarian. I must say, the dinner stretched my admittedly meagre cooking abilities to the limits, considering that I don’t eat 75% of what I put in the meals. The pesto turned out surprisingly good, though (I checked with a bona fide Italian~); basil, walnuts, Romano cheese, a squeeze of lemon, some garlic, some salt, and copious amounts of extra virgin olive oil! Speaking of pasta, I am a big fan of fettucine. Just putting it out there. One of my dreams include owning a pasta machine and making my own pasta. Part of this vision also has me incorporating vegetables into pasta so that I get to eat them without actually tasting them. Modest dreams, eh? Last night, I stir-fried some pork shoulder butt pieces with Chinese BBQ sauce. Most of the merit in my food derives from the fact that I spend so much time labouring over them, actually. Constant vigilance!! It must be difficult to replicate that on an industrial scale without any formal training. I was browsing through culinary arts schools on a whim and found one in Switzerland that seemed ridiculously luxurious and expensive. Quite realistically speaking, I suppose this would simply remain a cherished hobby.
I slept eleven hours last night. Is it true that your childhood habits and environment affect, to a huge extent, your personality and subsequent lifestyle? The lack of competition and external pressure here makes me uneasy, lulls me into a false sense of security, dulls my edge. I am clearly rapidly losing motivation.
Nothing quite positive to say. Spent the last paltry three hours on math, trying to redeem myself, but was sadly unable to focus very well. If only? People are tiring me, a little, even as I try to avoid the fatigue of solitude.